Lessons Learned From Toddlers

Yo! Yo! YO! What's up, my people? Super-Fly GMC in the hiz-ouse! (Sylvie-Faye Gretchen Marie Coppee, that is. Yes, my parents actually did that to me. Five names. It's amazing I'm so well adjusted. What are we - royalty? Geez!) Today I'm gonna' show all you happenin' "tods" what's up! It's time for Surviving The Toddler Years One-Oh-One! There's five key points in this first lesson and I'm using the help of my annoying baby sis, Chloe "Laryngitis" Coppee to help me demonstrate these new concepts, yo! (Well, she should have laryngitis with all the screaming she does. It's amazing she still has vocal cords intact!)

1. You can never get too close to the TV.

2. If you can't play a game by the rules...

...change 'em.

3. Swimming pools are lame.

4. Office chair rides through the house rule!

5. And finally, if mom says "no" to the third packet of fruit snacks, just go grab it anyway when she's not looking and lure your baby sister under the kitchen table with you.

Then, play nice and giggle a lot (especially make the baby sister giggle a lot)

Hearing this will put mom in an exceptionally good mood (most likely because you and baby sister have been screaming for two weeks straight and she's losing her nerve), and when she finally walks over and takes a peek...

..she'll find the giggling and hiding so darn cute, she'll overlook the underage scheming and give you want you want.

**She might even throw her head back and roar with laughter and then pull out her camera and snap tons of pictures. That's what my mom did anyway. That's how you got these lovely, full-color illustrations with the story, fool!